Are you looking to build stronger and more fulfilling relationships with your loved ones? Have you heard about the term communal love? Well now you have.
Communal relationships are close relationships where partners prioritize each other’s needs and well-being, without expecting anything in return. It’s a selfless approach to relationships that can lead to deeper connections and greater happiness.
Building a communal relationship requires a different mindset than the typical exchange-based relationships we often see in society. Instead of keeping score and expecting quid pro quo, communal relationships are built on a foundation of mutual care and support. This type of relationship can be especially beneficial for couples, as it allows both partners to feel seen, heard, and valued in the relationship.
By prioritizing each other’s needs, you can build a deeper level of trust and intimacy that can help sustain your relationship over time. It’s like that saying, if you expect somethin in return for being a nice person you aren’t a nice person. To put it in perspective, if you expect something from being a good partner, chances are you aren’t a good partner.
What is a Communal Relationship?
In a communal relationship, the interaction between two people is primarily governed by consideration of the other person’s needs and wishes. This contrasts with an exchange relationship, where the focus is on receiving as much as you give. Communal relationships are close relationships where partners suspend their need for equity and exchange, giving support to the partner to meet their needs, without considering the costs to themselves.
Most communal relationships are mutual and symmetrical, meaning that partners assume equivalent levels of responsibility for one another’s welfare. In other words, both partners feel the same degree of communal responsibility for the other. Examples of these types of relationships include friendships, sibling relationships, and romantic relationships.
Communal relationships can be contrasted with exchange relationships, where people are concerned mainly with receiving as much as they give. In an exchange relationship, partners keep track of what they give and what they receive, and they expect to be repaid in kind. For example, in a business relationship, you might expect to be paid for your services. In a communal relationship, on the other hand, you might offer your services without expecting anything in return.
In a communal relationship, partners are more likely to be motivated by love, affection, and a desire to help the other person. They are less concerned with keeping score or making sure that everything is fair. Instead, they focus on meeting the other person’s needs and building a strong, supportive relationship.
Communication in Communal Relationships
In communal relationships, and any other relationships for that matter, communication is key to maintaining a strong and healthy partnership. Effective communication helps build trust, resolve conflicts, and deepen emotional connections. In this section, we will discuss the importance of communication in communal relationships and provide some effective communication techniques.
Importance of Communication
Communication is the foundation of any successful relationship, and communal relationships are no exception. When partners communicate openly and honestly, they can establish trust and build a deeper emotional connection. Effective communication also helps partners understand each other’s needs, desires, and boundaries, which is essential for maintaining a healthy and fulfilling relationship.
In communal relationships, communication is particularly important because partners rely on each other for emotional and practical support. Without open and honest communication, misunderstandings and conflicts can arise, which can damage the relationship and erode trust.
Effective Communication Techniques
Effective communication requires both partners to be active listeners and clear communicators. Here are some techniques that can help you communicate more effectively in your communal relationship:
- Active Listening: When your partner is speaking, give them your full attention and try to understand their perspective. Avoid interrupting or dismissing their feelings, even if you disagree with them.
- Use “I” Statements: Instead of blaming or criticizing your partner, use “I” statements to express your own feelings and needs. For example, say “I feel hurt when you don’t listen to me” instead of “You never listen to me.”
- Validate Your Partner’s Feelings: Even if you don’t agree with your partner’s perspective, it’s important to validate their feelings. Let them know that you understand how they feel and that their emotions are valid.
- Take a Time-Out: If a conversation is getting heated, take a break and come back to it later when you both have had time to calm down. This can help prevent conflicts from escalating and allow you to approach the conversation with a cooler head.
By using these effective communication techniques, you can build a stronger and more fulfilling communal relationship with your partner. Remember that communication is a two-way street, and both partners must be committed to open and honest communication to make the relationship work.
Exchange Relationships vs. Communal Relationships
When it comes to relationships, there are two main types: exchange relationships and communal relationships. Understanding the differences between these two types of relationships can help you navigate your own relationships more effectively.
Differences between Exchange and Communal Relationships
Exchange relationships are based on a quid pro quo or “something for something” principle. In other words, you do something for someone else with the expectation that they will do something for you in return. These types of relationships are often transactional and based on mutual benefit. For example, you might help a coworker with a project in exchange for their help on a future project.
On the other hand, communal relationships are based on a sense of shared responsibility and mutual concern for each other’s well-being. In these types of relationships, you do things for other people because you care about them and want to help them, without any expectation of receiving something in return. Communal relationships are often seen in close relationships like friendships, romantic relationships, and family relationships.
One key difference between exchange and communal relationships is the way that benefits are exchanged. In exchange relationships, benefits are exchanged in a more transactional way, whereas in communal relationships, benefits are exchanged more freely and without the expectation of receiving something in return.
Another difference is the way that obligations are viewed. In exchange relationships, obligations are seen as something that must be repaid, whereas in communal relationships, obligations are seen as something that is freely given without any expectation of repayment.
Understanding the differences between exchange and communal relationships can help you navigate your own relationships more effectively. By recognizing which type of relationship you are in, you can adjust your expectations and behaviors accordingly. Remember, both types of relationships can be valuable and important in their own ways.
Building and Maintaining Communal Relationships
Communal relationships are close relationships in which partners suspend their need for equity and exchange, giving support to the partner in order to meet his or her needs, and without consideration of the costs to themselves. Building and maintaining communal relationships can help you fulfill your needs, desires, and welfare in a more satisfying way. Here are some actions you can take to build and maintain communal relationships.
Actions for Building Communal Relationships
- Find commonalities: Look for common interests, goals, or values that you share with others. This can help you establish a connection with them and build a sense of community.
- Offer support: Show interest in the welfare of others and offer support whenever possible. This can be as simple as listening to someone when they need to talk or helping them with a task.
- Be reliable: Follow through on your commitments and be dependable. This can help build trust and strengthen your relationships.
- Communicate effectively: Use clear and honest communication to establish mutual understanding and respect. This can help prevent misunderstandings and conflicts.
Interestingly enough, these are also basic principles of a healthy relationship. I suggest you master these if you want to improve yourself as a partner.
Maintaining Communal Relationships
- Stay in touch: Regularly check in with your acquaintances and friends to maintain your relationships. This is especially important in long distance relationships.
- Be present: Give your full attention to the people you are with and be present in the moment. This can help strengthen your connections and show that you value their company.
- Express gratitude: Show appreciation for the people in your life and the ways they support you. This can help build a positive and supportive environment.
- Resolve conflicts: Address conflicts in a respectful and constructive way to prevent them from damaging your relationships. This can involve active listening, compromise, and finding common ground.
Research shows that communal motivation can help build relationships. When desiring a close relationship, people are more attracted to others who provide benefits based on needs rather than those who provide benefits only in direct exchange for the ones they receive. By building and maintaining communal relationships, you can fulfill your needs and desires in a more satisfying way while also supporting the welfare of those around you.
The Role of Children and Parents in Communal Relationships
Fostering this type of relationship can be beneficial in raising kids and working better together as parents. Communal relationships are characterized by a sense of responsibility for meeting the needs of communal partners. In such relationships, parents often have strong communal relationships with their own children, putting their child’s welfare above their own welfare and spending years providing emotional and tangible support.
Parenting in Communal Relationships
In communal relationships, parenting involves a sense of responsibility for meeting the needs of the child, and the parent’s own needs are met in the process of caring for the child. This means that parents need to be attuned to their child’s needs, provide emotional support, and be responsive to their child’s cues.
In communal relationships, parenting is a collaborative effort between the parents, and both parents take an active role in raising the child. This means that both parents need to be attuned to the child’s needs and provide support in a way that is consistent with the child’s developmental stage.
Children’s Role in Communal Relationships
In communal relationships, children play an active role in maintaining the relationship with their parents. Children are responsible for communicating their needs to their parents and for being responsive to their parents’ needs.
Children in communal relationships are expected to be emotionally expressive and to communicate their needs in a way that is clear and direct. This means that children need to be comfortable expressing their emotions and communicating their needs to their parents.
In communal relationships, children are also expected to be responsive to their parents’ needs. This means that children need to be aware of their parents’ emotional state and be willing to provide support when needed.
In conclusion, these unified relationships are characterized by a sense of responsibility for meeting the needs of communal partners. In such relationships, parents and children play an active role in maintaining the relationship, with parents providing emotional and tangible support to their children, and children being responsive to their parents’ needs. By working together, parents and children can build strong and enriching communal relationships that promote well-being and emotional expression.
Communal Responsiveness and Exchange Orientation
What is Communal Responsiveness
In a communal relationship, the focus is on the well-being of the other person. Communal responsiveness is the extent to which you are attentive to the needs and feelings of your partner. It involves being empathetic, supportive, and willing to make sacrifices for the other person. When you are communally responsive, you prioritize your partner’s needs and feelings over your own.
The Role of Exchange Orientation
Exchange orientation, on the other hand, is the extent to which you view relationships as transactions. In an exchange relationship, people give and receive benefits based on the principle of reciprocity. For example, you might help your friend move, and in return, they might help you paint your house. In an exchange relationship, the focus is on keeping things fair and balanced.
While both communal and exchange orientations can be present in a relationship, research has shown that communal responsiveness is associated with greater relationship satisfaction and longevity. When you are communally responsive, you create a sense of security and trust in the relationship, which makes it easier to weather tough times.
To cultivate communal responsiveness in your relationship, try to be more attuned to your partner’s needs and feelings. Listen actively and respond with empathy and support. Make an effort to understand their perspective and be willing to compromise when necessary. Remember that the relationship is not just about you, but about both of you as a team.
In contrast, if you find yourself focused on keeping things fair and balanced, you may be more exchange-oriented. While this can be useful in certain situations, it can also lead to a lack of emotional connection and intimacy in the relationship. Try to shift your focus towards being more communally responsive, and see how it affects your relationship.
Benefits of Communal Relationships
Having communal relationships can be extremely beneficial for your overall well-being. Here are some of the benefits you can expect to enjoy from having strong communal relationships.
Psychological Benefits
Communal relationships can provide a sense of belonging and support, which can lead to increased self-esteem and a greater sense of purpose. The rewards of communal relationships are often non-material, such as emotional support, respect, and friendship. This can lead to a greater sense of joy and satisfaction in your life.
One of the key aspects of communal relationships is responsiveness. When you have a strong communal relationship, you can rely on your partner to be there for you when you need them. This can help you feel more secure and less anxious, as you know that you have someone to turn to in times of need.
To add, giving typically makes people feel good. When you do something nice for a person or when you help a person out, 9 times out of 10 you feel much batter about yourself which makes you want to do it again and again. This allows you to have a greater self-esteem and general life satisfaction (Psychology Today).
Social Benefits
Having strong communal relationships can also provide social benefits. For example, you may be more likely to engage in pro-social behaviors when you have strong communal relationships. This can include volunteering, donating to charity, or helping out a friend in need.
Communal relationships can also help you build close relationships with others. When you have strong communal relationships, you are more likely to feel connected to others and to have a sense of belonging. This can lead to a greater sense of joy and fulfillment in your life.
In conclusion, having strong communal relationships can provide a wide range of benefits, including psychological and social benefits. By focusing on building strong communal relationships, you can improve your overall well-being and enjoy a greater sense of joy and fulfillment in your life.
your pen pal,
L
Pingback: Why Exchange Relationships Fail: 6 Common Reasons and How to Avoid Them | Willorei Blog
Pingback: 7 Things That Make Long Distance Relationships Fail | Willorei Blog